Suffering Is Necessary For Happiness

Just got back from UFC 118. John fought a good fight and simply got caught. I was happy with his camp and happy with his effort. One of the the things I tell all of our fighter is that no matter how you do, as long as you give 100% you're still a champion. John trained very hard and came up short, but make no mistake he is still a champion.

I finished reading “A Million Miles In A Thousand Years” that my friend Steve Hannah gave to me as a gift. It was a good book about how life is basically a series of stories that we are living. And to have a good life you must have a series of good stories that define you.

The book referenced one of my favorite books: “Man’s Search For Meaning” and the story of Job from the bible. It also reminded me of the first line in the book “The Road Less Traveled” where it says “Life is difficult”.

One of the common themes in all of these great books is that our own suffering is necessary to live a better life and have a better understanding of the meaning. The “story” that we live must have conflict to make us stronger.

This idea, is in my opinion, why so many people are unhappy in life. We are so afraid of conflict that we avoid it at all costs. We don’t deal with problems and are looking for the quick material fix to make us happy. Conflict and suffering are absolutely necessary to have a truly meaningful life.

If we look back at all the adversity’s that we’ve had in life I would bet that with the majority of them we would say have made us stronger people. So why is it that we run from these adversity’s and choose not to deal with them? It’s through these trials and tribulations that we learn who we really are. Some people seem so happy on the outside but are being torn apart internally.

This got me thinking about the story that I’m currently living. I read something the other day that said “The blessings God places in your hands are determined by what you are willing to let go of first”. This is so true and something that has played out in my life. I know the things that I currently need to let go of and I have let go of a lot. I’ve learned this truth through my suffering.

I was meditating a couple weeks ago and a simple idea came to me that less is more. When I started thinking about what this message meant it made me realize the things that I need to let go of in life. It’s the suffering that I’ve experienced that allowed me to know what to cut out and what to keep. The idea is that the less stress, bills, and distractions I have the more happiness and financial freedom I can have and even in the end the more money I can make. I’m not at a bad financial spot right now but the recession over the last two years was very tough. It was through the suffering that I learned that a lot of the things I was doing with my money to make me seemingly happier was actually making me unhappy. It caused more stress. It caused me to have to re evaluate what I really wanted in life and what was truly important. In the end all the material things that I have had made me no happier.

I’ve been torn about wanting to do projects to help people and do the things that I’m currently doing now. I’m working on a system where I’m cutting everything out that does not help me be truly happy. In this process a lot of people will be cut out and I’m going to seem a bit cold. But the situations and experiences that have dragged me down in anyway must go. It’s only going to be when I let go of these things that God will bless me with more.

As I said in a previous blog I had something come to me in another mediation that said “let go and let be”. I’ve started to do this and I’m seeing good results. Spiritually I’m getting stronger. My heart is telling me to go save the world. I know that sounds a bit absurd but I have an opportunity to make a huge impact on society. I’m not sure when I’m going to make the project I’m working on public but I believe with everything in me that it will help millions of people.

To be able to do this to the best of my ability I’m going to have to let some things go and I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t difficult. But with the idea that less is more and let go and let be I’m well on my way to finding the true happiness we’re all searching for in humanity. Remember to give without remembering and receive without ever forgetting. Be good and loyal to those who are good and loyal to you. Because when you find people that you know are soldiers with you, that will fight to the end and have the whole ride or die mentality, those are the people that you should be concerned with when going on with relationships. I know who my real friends are and I know who is truly loyal and wants the best for me. All the other fake people can kindly get out of my way. It’s time for me to let go. I’ve learned this from suffering and I thank God for this blessing.

God Bless,

Ed Clay