"When I see I am nothing, that is wisdom. When I see I am everything, that is love. My life is a movement between these two."

I was reading the book "I am that" by Nisargadatta Maharaj and doing some meditation. This book is a contradiction to my life in a lot of ways but i have a very open mind and I'm always open to new ideas. I was meditating focusing on the "I am" and I kept getting that I am nothing. This was a bit confusing to me and I didn't know what it meant. It did somewhat give me peace but I knew it wasn't the complete answer. When I was reading more of the book he said this. "When I see I am nothing, that is wisdom. When I see I am everything, that is love. My life is a movement between these two."

When I read that it smacked me in the face! I couldn't believe that my mind kept telling me, in this black empty space, that I was nothing. I had yet to be able to comprehend this. I guess I need to move on to the point where "I am everything" but I'm not going to force it. I kind of wish I would have figured it out on my own in meditation, but at least I came up with the "I am nothing" on my own.

I just got back from Vegas and it was a fun trip. Lot's of partying. Like always we had the best of everything. It's one of my favorite places to visit though I wouldn't go back on memorial day weekend. Too busy and much more expensive the on a normal weekend.

When I'm there I can't help but feel a little low in enjoying the superficial things in life. I've worked so hard on expanding my mind that it's always a let down. Everyday while I was at the pool my mind would wonder off thinking about how none of the stuff I was enjoying really mattered. That said we have such a short time on earth I think that we should live life to the fullest and go hard!lol In the end though the only thing that really matters is peace and love in/for yourself and others. That's a balance I'm still looking for... Waiting for full enlightenment... I've got a ways to go!

Peace!

EC